5 Signs That You Have A Bad Friend

It took me longer than usual to figure out the exact message I wanted to articulate in this post. I was able to find all of the words to say, because I have had some bad friends that I have stopped associating with.

Every single person has had a bad friend before. The question is have we all learned our lesson? Have bad friends learned how to become the ideal friend?

I will be the first to admit that it is hard for me to let go of certain friendships. I usually struggle with letting go of friendships that I have had for years. I am a loyal and honest person, so when loyalty and honesty isn’t reciprocated I’m hurt. I’ve learned that not everyone is supposed to go with you to your next stage in life. Don’t continue to hold on to something that God wants you to let go of.

Everyone makes mistakes, but sometimes people do and say things that can threaten or severely damage their friendships. We would all like to think that we have amazing friends, but if you recognize any of the five traits listed below within one or some of your friends you may want to reevaluate your circle.

Below I have outlined 5 signs that you have a bad friend.

Takes and Rarely Gives

I am an only child so I never had to share with anyone on a consistent basis prior to college. College has taught me the importance of giving freely. In a friendship both parties should be willing to help each other in trying times and in not so trying times. You and your friend do not have to exchange physical gifts, but having a friend that gives you time and attention is so valuable. Having a shoulder to cry on is something that money can’t buy. If you have a friend that takes your time, gas and food for granted you may want to consider terminating that friendship.

Always With the Drama

I am a 21-year-old female and I live a completely drama free life. I will not invite a person into my life that involves his or herself with drama. Drama is usually birthed from a lack of communication and this communication major makes it a priority to communicate effectively. As you get older the drama in your life is supposed to decrease significantly. Life is too short not to be drama-free.

Tells Others Your Business

If you share information with your friend about your personal life and they tell someone else your personal business terminate that friendship on the spot. A friendship requires trust. If you tell your friend something because you are seeking advice or just need someone to vent to they should respect your privacy enough to keep that information to his or herself. Some people can’t help but gossip and a true friend would never gossip about someone they care about. A friend who feels comfortable spreading your business all around town probably feeds off of drama.

Not a Good Listener

I cannot be a friend to someone who does not listen well. I cannot befriend a poor listener, because we won’t be able to communicate with each other effectively. Those who do not communicate well are frustrating to work with. Also, when people care about each other they listen to each other’s stories no matter how boring the stories are.

You Always Reach Out To Them First

I believe that if the feelings are mutual the efforts will be equal. I’m a firm believer that people make time for what they believe is important. If your friend is always too busy to reach out to you then your friend doesn’t deem your friendship as something worthy of his or her time.

My father always used to say that when you die, if you’ve got five real friends, then you’ve had a great life.” –Lee Iacocca


Happy 21st Birthday to Me!

Happy 21 Birthday to me! Photo credit: June Ramadhan

Happy 21 Birthday to me! Photo credit: June Ramadhan

Procrastinators Unite…Tomorrow!


How To Stop Procrastination

Procrastination plagues undergraduate college students more than any other student population according to a study done in 2011 by Cumhuriyet University located in the country of Turkey.

If you do not know what procrastination is that is a beautiful thing, but I’m pretty sure it’s an SAT word so let me fill you in. Merriam-Webster defines procrastination as to delay doing something until later because you do not want to do it or because you are lazy.

This is a great definition and many of us are guilty of procrastinating. We have all thought, “Oh I’ll do that later.” or “It’s not going to take that long. I’ll just do it before class.” or “I work best under stress.” 

A student underestimating how long an assignment will take is one of the top five reasons as to why students procrastinate.

A horrible procrastinator usually earns a grade point average of 2.9 while those who are more on top of their schoolwork are able to earn an average of 3.6. These figures were found from a study conducted by Ohio State University.

Many of us have been victim of earning a terrible grade or missing out on a great opportunity, because we waited until the last minute to do something.

As you get older those second chances to correct your mistakes or hand in late work come far and few in-between.

As you begin to build your reputation you do not want to be known as the irresponsible and unreliable student who just cannot seem to get anything done within a timely manner.

We have all heard it before: Do not wait until the last minute to do things. Nothing good can come from waiting up until the last minute. Students become a stressed, nervous wreck when they are scrambling to hand things in on time.

My advice to you:

1. Prioritize

Take a sheet of paper and fold it so that you have four equal squares. In the top left hand box write Today. In the top right hand box write This Week. In the bottom left hand box write Next Week. Finally in the bottom right hand box write This Month. In each box write down what you need to get done within that time period. Now you have a list of you can see your responsibilities and you have a timeline in which you would like to get everything done.

2. Create a Functional Work Space

DO NOT DO YOUR HOMEWORK ON YOUR BED!!! That is a huge No-No. How are you going to be productive in the same exact space where you sleep? Create an appropriate workspace with minimal noise, adequate lighting, and enough desk space. Only do work in this area. Also make it a stress free place. Make it a place where you can just relax and complete your work.

3. Do Your Work

There are no benefits gained from not doing your work. You simply become a frantic student who produces work that is less than par. Remember what I said about missed opportunities? I waited until the last hour of the last day to apply to be a Resident Assistant at my University. Something unfortunate occurred and now I may have to wait an entire year in order to apply. When you get older people don’t tend to be as lenient with giving second chances, because you were being lazy.

“You may delay, but time will not.” ― Benjamin Franklin

– Ariana

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What Advice to Give on a Birthday


Advice For a Birthday Person

   It is no small feat to survive another 365 days. People are murdered, hit by cars, commit suicide, slip and fall, die expectantly or of natural causes.I lived for two decades, which means I have done some maturing and have some pieces advice I would like to share with you.

Here they are:

1. Document Your Life

There is no way that you are going to remember everything that occurs in your life, so write it down! Try to set a goal of writing in a journal or diary at least once a week or daily. Even if you just take a few seconds to jot down a few thoughts you will reap great benefits. A journal or diary allows you to reflect on where you’ve been and how far you’ve come. Especially when you are able to read about what you did and how you felt a year ago. The Huffington Post released an article that outlines 26 reasons why you should keep a journal.

2. Set Goals For Yourself

Setting goals in life is more than extremely important. Time stops for no one and it moves quickly.  You do not want your life to pass you by, so take sometime to think about what you want to accomplish within the next year. What is it that you want to do? I like to set and update my goals in three-month intervals. For example one of my goals is to find an internship for the summer. Make a list of goals, give yourself a reasonable amount of time to complete each goal, and start working hard. Forbes has a great article on goal setting.

3. Love Yourself

This is something that people tend to struggle with, but once you begin genuinely loving who you are your entire life will change. You will feel more confident, you’ll be happier; you’ll begin interacting with people differently, and you will have a stronger command over your life. It begins with your internal dialogue. Do you talk to yourself in a loving manner? Or are you always saying negative things to yourself? Whenever you think, why me? Ask yourself, why not me? Everyone who is successful in life did not get where they are today, because they thought they couldn’t do it. Show your authentic self to the world without fear and do what makes you smile. Love is a verb as well, so you have to treat your body like you love it. This means no drinking and smoking every chance you get, because you are killing your body from the inside out. Be you and love whoever that is.

4. Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

I’m not saying scream YOLO and throw everything to the wayside. I am telling you to have fun, because everyone dies in the end! The last thing you want to do is be in your 60s and regret things you didn’t do in your 20s.

In youth we learn; in age we understand – Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach

– Ariana

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